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. But the real issue was that I was afraid of being the girl that a man like Steve could love.Like Jared loved me.I'd seen it in his eyes and I'd known it in my heart and if we'd had more time together ... A whole summer, I thought. If I had a summer to spend with Jared, by the end of it I'd be ready to tell him I loved him. I'd be his girlfriend and wearing dresses and little pink panties. I'd let my hair grow out and paint my fingernails red and wear high heels too. I was giggling in the shower and touching my body, biting my bottom lip and feeling it sore from Ben's gentle teeth. Him too. I coulda been a girlfriend for both of them easy, I thought. I wanted to be beautiful and see that look in Jared's eyes when he was kissing me."I'm a girl," I said out loud and I was still smiling, which should have amazed me probably. But I could see the reasons for it and how one thing had led to another, and then the next and ... Yeah, "I'm a girl."Of course, knowing it and saying it was a lot. "It has more to do with the feelings. Hypothetically, could I have two women in my bed at the same time? I suppose so if I had feelings for both of them. But then I'd be worried about whether or not one thought I was giving the other more attention or if they would be jealous of each other ... You see that's what I would be thinking if it were the two guys scenario. I just don't see how it would work." I shook my head sadly."They would have to very comfortable with each other and ya be understanding them very well," Niamh nodded."I suppose," I shrugged. "Not much of a concern to me right now." Ah want to know why ya said Leanne canna be with another man specifically," Shauna interrupted with a malicious grin. "Does that mean she can have another woman as a lover?" You are a troublemaker!" I growled."Then ya can spank me for it later. Oof!" she grinned as Eimile gave her an elbow in the ribs."You just want me to admit I'm a hypocrite," I accused. "Fine, I'm a hypocrite. The thought of.
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